Banged in High Heels

Last night, my friends and I went on an adventure to Boston, in which the following events occurred:

1) We almost ran over an 8 year old brandishing a gun

2) Our fabulously gay, asian waiter was in love with our friend Rob

3) We missed out on all the packies being open, so we had to take $7.88 nips from the fridge in the hotel room we rented

4) We went to The Liquor Store (a club, not a packie) and danced on stripper poles

5) Habeeb and friends tried to Divide and Conquer 

6) Josh was mistaken for a pimp

7) We watched something called Banged in High Heels - which is exactly what it sounds like

I've seen some hilarious porn in my day (Xena, Porn Warrior Princess, anyone?) but nothing could compare to the disaster that was "BHH". When it comes down to it, this is what we discerned from the movie:

A) Sex sounds like horses trotting briskly on cobblestones

B) Women always wear drag queen heels to bed

C) Landing Strips, when left unattended, become Autobahns 

D) Seabiscuit wears what I wore to prom (i.e. a fishnet dress)

E) Women, while copulating, resemble massive arachnids

All-in-all, it was a very wholesome, wondrous evening. Now if only I could sober up (and stop drinking, because I've had 3 caramel apple martinis tonight, and considering I'm running on 3 hours sleep and had wayyyy too much to drink last night, I should probably attempt to control myself.)